So beautiful, especially the photo of you and Elena. That is a precious gift to be about to nurse your baby. And your other babies? You're right? Our time is finite. I feel like I've waste a lot of mine, yet looking back, it amazes me the projects I've been able to finish. Even if our moments are spent noticing things around us, that is time well spent. To love, to nurture, to see and hear, to share what we've learned. What a gift is life!
Some of my favorite times as a mother was in the wee hours of the morning, all alone with my child and the silence, the rest of the world quiet and asleep, while I rocked peacefully and got to spend that silent time marveling at the beautiful child in my arms. Your project of Dandelion Seeds is your diary. You will re-read your posts as you and your child age and change and you will be reminded of your thoughts and feelings at those particular times of your life. And like dandelion seeds these reminders will grow into new dreams and thoughts and projects as your child grows and you change priorities and dreams. Even if we/you only get to do this once, you will have those memories forever and the remembering will be enough to make you smile. I found myself smiling as I looked at the picture of you and Elena and I remembered this stage of my motherhood.
Well done Candace! This is such a poignant reminder about so many things in our life. If we can hold this sentiment front of mind as we move through our days it helps us have clarity about what's most important❤
I'm not a mother and I guess I am considerably older than you, but your recognition of the shortness of our lives is a poignant and pertinent one. When we are so busy working and 'doing' life it is easy to think that there will always be time. There won't. I wish I'd realised that before I hit my sixties - I envy younger generations who are realising it sooner, and living better lives. This was a lovely piece, thank you.
They are only with us for a few short years, hours really. My daughter jetted off on a work assignment this morning and my son flew to the Midwest twice in the last two weeks. Both are comfortable in the world and are finding their own definitions of success, but it was only a very short time ago that I carried my daughter in a Snugly on our morning walks in the African bush. I’ve changed her nappies in villages where all the women gathered around and laughed at the sight of a man taking care of a baby. My son helped me do projects at home when he was a toddler and now he runs his own business, when he isn’t at a river making beautiful loops with a fly line and rod.
Sometimes I regret and resent those precious weeks when my work took me away from them, but it’s the part of adulting we can’t easily set aside. But from the time they were born, my wife decided to be a full time mom, a career not highly regarded these days, and if I had won the lottery, I would have chosen to be a stay at home dad. Not everyone can make the choices we did, and many consider it a kind of enslavement, but we always felt that it was a privilege. It meant we didn’t get new cars every year or so, and we never took exotic vacations, but we did have a sailboat on the Chesapeake that we loved to sail and explore the nooks and crannies along the bay shoreline.
Would we make the same choices? Absolutely and with greater urgency. The world hasn’t changed for the better during the past three decades and the lives of our children are too precious to put at risk.
If you never got suck in the mud at low tide, you never sailed the Chesapeake. It happened once to a friend and me at the mouth of Jones Creek. “What do we do now,” he asked. “I’m going below to make a sandwich and take a nap. Let me know when she is floating again.”
"I once believed I needed to hold a book in my hands to feel like I’m doing my best creative work. Now, as long as that work exists in the world, it feels like enough."
---
True words and a lovely sentiment Candace.
To be somewhat contrary though, I don't think any of us having our best creative work exist just on a website is enough.
Fifty years from now none of these websites will exist, everything will be gone, replaced by something else.
Try finding something a friend posted on Facebook a few years ago.
If your darling Elena can pull a copy of her mother's work, all her thoughts and all her dreams, down from a bookshelf, and slowly page through them, then they will truly exist in the world.
And what a wonderful legacy for her to inherit.
I guess what I'm trying clumsily to say is, at some point, please arrange to keep a physical copy of your "best creative work".
Print a yearly book, keep a folder of A4 sheets, anything, but don't just leave them on a server somewhere, soon they will not exist.
This is a concept that has resonated with me so often and again lately, so this really spoke to me today! Thank you for sharing and for the perspective check. I am hoping to write about this myself this week. Cherish those moments. Especially with little ones in our lives. Mine are 20 and 22 and time goes all too quickly!
Amen. Once the pitter patter of little feet fill your house the time just FAST forwards.
I’ve had moments of such profound joy as a mother that I thought every trial, every pain had ever known been worth it just to live that precious moment. Those are the ones you hold in your heart like a glass menagerie that bring a smile amidst worry or anger.
It's easy to forget when our personal drives take over. I struggle to keep a balance now that my children are older.
Motherhood has been the most fulfilling parts of my life. As I step into the role of being a grandmother I want to hold on to this still, I remember my granny as one of the most important people in my life.
Oh my, I so very much needed to find this today...this week...this month...THIS LIFE. Thank you! I have decisions to think about and more importantly, decisions to make! Thank you!
Beautiful, Candace. Thanks for sharing. I often feel that way about motherhood too.
So beautiful, especially the photo of you and Elena. That is a precious gift to be about to nurse your baby. And your other babies? You're right? Our time is finite. I feel like I've waste a lot of mine, yet looking back, it amazes me the projects I've been able to finish. Even if our moments are spent noticing things around us, that is time well spent. To love, to nurture, to see and hear, to share what we've learned. What a gift is life!
So good to hear those words. The only thing we ever have is the moment we are in, the love and hope in our hearts, our memories
Some of my favorite times as a mother was in the wee hours of the morning, all alone with my child and the silence, the rest of the world quiet and asleep, while I rocked peacefully and got to spend that silent time marveling at the beautiful child in my arms. Your project of Dandelion Seeds is your diary. You will re-read your posts as you and your child age and change and you will be reminded of your thoughts and feelings at those particular times of your life. And like dandelion seeds these reminders will grow into new dreams and thoughts and projects as your child grows and you change priorities and dreams. Even if we/you only get to do this once, you will have those memories forever and the remembering will be enough to make you smile. I found myself smiling as I looked at the picture of you and Elena and I remembered this stage of my motherhood.
Well done Candace! This is such a poignant reminder about so many things in our life. If we can hold this sentiment front of mind as we move through our days it helps us have clarity about what's most important❤
I'm not a mother and I guess I am considerably older than you, but your recognition of the shortness of our lives is a poignant and pertinent one. When we are so busy working and 'doing' life it is easy to think that there will always be time. There won't. I wish I'd realised that before I hit my sixties - I envy younger generations who are realising it sooner, and living better lives. This was a lovely piece, thank you.
They are only with us for a few short years, hours really. My daughter jetted off on a work assignment this morning and my son flew to the Midwest twice in the last two weeks. Both are comfortable in the world and are finding their own definitions of success, but it was only a very short time ago that I carried my daughter in a Snugly on our morning walks in the African bush. I’ve changed her nappies in villages where all the women gathered around and laughed at the sight of a man taking care of a baby. My son helped me do projects at home when he was a toddler and now he runs his own business, when he isn’t at a river making beautiful loops with a fly line and rod.
Sometimes I regret and resent those precious weeks when my work took me away from them, but it’s the part of adulting we can’t easily set aside. But from the time they were born, my wife decided to be a full time mom, a career not highly regarded these days, and if I had won the lottery, I would have chosen to be a stay at home dad. Not everyone can make the choices we did, and many consider it a kind of enslavement, but we always felt that it was a privilege. It meant we didn’t get new cars every year or so, and we never took exotic vacations, but we did have a sailboat on the Chesapeake that we loved to sail and explore the nooks and crannies along the bay shoreline.
Would we make the same choices? Absolutely and with greater urgency. The world hasn’t changed for the better during the past three decades and the lives of our children are too precious to put at risk.
Chiming in with enthusiasm about the wonders of cruising and sailing the Chesapeake Bay. 😊
If you never got suck in the mud at low tide, you never sailed the Chesapeake. It happened once to a friend and me at the mouth of Jones Creek. “What do we do now,” he asked. “I’m going below to make a sandwich and take a nap. Let me know when she is floating again.”
Mud. Glorious mud. Embrace it.
There are two kinds of sailors on the Chesapeake- those who have run aground and those who are about to.
I usually walked amud.
"I once believed I needed to hold a book in my hands to feel like I’m doing my best creative work. Now, as long as that work exists in the world, it feels like enough."
---
True words and a lovely sentiment Candace.
To be somewhat contrary though, I don't think any of us having our best creative work exist just on a website is enough.
Fifty years from now none of these websites will exist, everything will be gone, replaced by something else.
Try finding something a friend posted on Facebook a few years ago.
If your darling Elena can pull a copy of her mother's work, all her thoughts and all her dreams, down from a bookshelf, and slowly page through them, then they will truly exist in the world.
And what a wonderful legacy for her to inherit.
I guess what I'm trying clumsily to say is, at some point, please arrange to keep a physical copy of your "best creative work".
Print a yearly book, keep a folder of A4 sheets, anything, but don't just leave them on a server somewhere, soon they will not exist.
Seems logical. I’m a sentimental quirky nerd but logic and reason matter. You have outlined all of the above very well so thanks
Beautiful 🥰🥰🥰 this resonated a lot.
This is a concept that has resonated with me so often and again lately, so this really spoke to me today! Thank you for sharing and for the perspective check. I am hoping to write about this myself this week. Cherish those moments. Especially with little ones in our lives. Mine are 20 and 22 and time goes all too quickly!
Amen. Once the pitter patter of little feet fill your house the time just FAST forwards.
I’ve had moments of such profound joy as a mother that I thought every trial, every pain had ever known been worth it just to live that precious moment. Those are the ones you hold in your heart like a glass menagerie that bring a smile amidst worry or anger.
A resounding yes to that too, Maureen!! Beautifully put :)
This makes me smile, truly. 🥲
Candace, you have a gift for powerful words, and you do it in the most gentle way. I was so moved by this post.
It's easy to forget when our personal drives take over. I struggle to keep a balance now that my children are older.
Motherhood has been the most fulfilling parts of my life. As I step into the role of being a grandmother I want to hold on to this still, I remember my granny as one of the most important people in my life.
My motherly role continues.
Thank you for sharing.
❤️❤️❤️
Oh my, I so very much needed to find this today...this week...this month...THIS LIFE. Thank you! I have decisions to think about and more importantly, decisions to make! Thank you!
I've read this 3x, Candace. So beautiful. And the photo of you with sweet Elena? OMGoodness. This post stays with me. ♥️